I’m entirely too hungover to read the news and come up with something erudite this morning, so I’m going to repost this YouTube video of some stupid ass child running into a breakdancing routine.

I mean, I realize that kids run around willy-nilly because they don’t know any better and as soon as you figure out how legs work, you’re off like a speeding bullet. I am sure I gave my mom years worth of migraines running up and down the aisles at church (at least I didn’t immediately burst into flame like I would if I set foot in a church now). But I’m entirely over little kids being allowed to run around like hellions. I work part-time in retail in a bi-level store and cannot tell you how many times I’ve rescued some kid before they go ass over noggin down the steps because their irresponsible parents are too busy trying on $80 Nike workout capris to notice.

So, put your kid on a leash or use a condom.

Thanks to Gawker.com for first look at the vid.

Similar articles that might also interest you:

• Are you a good person?
• My new haircut with 2 fucking jager bombs
• Street Artist Julian Beever
• Mr. Wizard passes at age 89
• Ubuntu is now dusty